Obnoxious things you'll hear from girls

I'm really getting sick of the people I've been associating myself with. Every girl I've come in contact with is the same: They think they're so sure about everything and think they're smarter than everyone else.
So to take these people down a peg, I've come up with responses to all the cliche bs I've been hearing...

1. I'm not fake like everyone else
Meaning: I'm the most fake beeotch (yes, I spelled it) you'll ever meet in your life

2. I don't care what people think of me
Yeah, you do. Who are you trying to kid? Besides, you wouldn't be saying that if people liked you

3. I wear a fake smile
Coming from the people who say they 'love their life.' There's a saying I like that goes with this: "do i regret one thing? never, because at one point i did what i wanted and i got my satisfaction!"
Yes, I stole that from someone

4. I don't need a guy controlling my life
So is that why you've been with the same a-hole for the past x amount of years?

5. I feel I'm more mature than most girls my age
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Are you kidding me?

6. I've done things I regret
These are the same people who claim to have no regrets
Vice versa

7. You will never know me
People say this all the time, what the hell is that supposed to mean?

8. I'm done, I'm over this, I'm independent
Honey, no you're not. By the way, this phrase is so overused (if that's a word) that it's lost its meaning

9. I'm not taking his crap anymore
Next day you'll be making out with him, watch

10. I'm far from perfect, and I'm OK with that
I don't believe that

11. I'm not looking to fight her
But if you were alone with her, she'd end up with a black eye, right?

12. I don't want anyone else getting involved in my business
Yeah, right. That's why you complain about your life on MySpace and to anyone who will pretend to listen

13. This is the start of a brand new me
Nope, same person I didn't like from the beginning

14. I take my beliefs very seriously
Aw, that's sweet. By the way, nice default of you in a bikini on your uncle's Lamborghini

15. She has nothing better to do than talk shit about me
Look who's talking

16. I'm not like her, she's a bitch
You never know, you may have more in common than you think

17. I don't lie
Liar