This is Why I Love Dreams

So I've been thinking about college lately. I want to go straight to university; I have a 28 ACT score, so that should help. My parents are all split on this: my mom says I can get into 4-year and thinks that's a good idea, my stepdad thinks I can only get in 4-year if I get a pretty hefty scholarship, my dad would really like it if I went to community college first.

I can't tell you how many times I've said, "I give up on this." Sometimes I won't want to go to college, sometimes I'll think about going to 2-year first (if I do, you might as well write "Failure" on my forehead; I've worked too damn hard to start at 2-year). One night I said, "My stepdad wins, I'm going to 2-year, I don't care anymore." That night, I had a dream that reminded me why I wanted to go away for college:

I was in my room hanging out with two of my friends when my stepdad starts scolding me for something as I try to defend myself (scolding; I tell you, this man never yells at anyone, I love that about him). I go downstairs to help my mom with something. Her back is turned to me like she is under a lot of stress; it looked like she was decorating for a party or something. She yelled at me to leave, so I went back upstairs. My stepdad is still scolding me and I turn to my friends to back me up, but they're on his side (sorry, I wish I could remember what is was about).

Now I remember why I wanted to leave; I felt under stress and misunderstood at home, I felt like no one (or very few) could help me, my stepdad criticizes whatever I do, my mom screams at me and takes it out on me whenever she is under stress (I love my mom and I respect my stepdad, don't get me wrong), I want to meet more people and not see the same people I've seen for years.

I really hope this works out for the best in the long run. Damn recession...